Unlocking Self-Esteem and Overcoming ADHD’s Impact with Raun Melmed and Caroline Bliss Larsen

In today's episode, host Dr. Carla Marie Manley, a clinical psychologist and author from Sonoma County, California, talks to Raun Melmed  Caroline Larsen, who have co-authored the book "Marvin's Monster Diary 5: ADHD Self-Esteem Blues." The episode promises to be an incredible discussion about the power of books, ADHD, self-esteem, and finding ways to brighten up amidst challenges. Listeners can look forward to gaining valuable insights and information about supporting families and individuals dealing with ADHD and related issues.

 

Episode Highlights:

• 01:06: Caroline describes herself as an editor and web accessibility specialist currently residing in Utah. She expresses her passion for books and writing, especially the "Marvin's Monster Diary" series, which she co-authored with Dr. Raun Melmed.
• 02:01: The book holds significant personal meaning for Caroline, as the topic of self-esteem hits close to home. She mentions that working on this book has been a joyful experience, and she hopes that it makes a positive difference for children. The book's aim is to teach kids valuable tools for understanding and managing their emotions and behaviors.
• 02:35: As a developmental pediatrician, Raun's daily iinteracts dailyhildren facing various challenges, such as anxiety, poor self-esteem, and ADHD.
• 03:23: Raun emphasizes the importance of self-esteem, stating that it is a significant and essential issue for everyone, including parents who wish for their children to have good self-esteem.
• 04:13: Raun acknowledges that while bibliotherapy, or self-help therapy through books, is only a part of the overall treatment for any individual, the books are appropriately specific, especially when addressing self-esteem issues in typical children and those with ADHD, who often face significant challenges. 
• 06:54: Having ADHD is not solely about being hyperactive; the key factor is the harm and dysfunction it causes in various aspects of a child's life. One of the most significant challenges for children with ADHD is the associated difficulties with self-esteem.
• 08:16: As per Raun both parents and children play a role in changing and improving self-esteem.
• 09:12: A certain level of perfectionism can contribute to success, he also points out that chronic perfectionism can become problematic when it starts affecting other aspects of the child's life, such as their socialization with peers.
• 10:04: Individuals with low self-esteem may exhibit tendencies toward violence, bullying, or being bullied, while those with positive self-esteem tend to have better interactions with others and overall better outcomes in life.
• 12:05: Having structure in a child's routine can be a way to promote optimal anxiety. Providing a schedule and setting expectations can help strike the right balance for optimal performance.
• 13:54: Self-esteem is greatly influenced by self-talk, and it's crucial for parents to recognize when their child uses negative self-talk and correct it.
• 16:20: Parents should put their children in situations where they can struggle a little bit but have the potential to overcome obstacles and achieve success. It's essential to find a balance between providing challenges and ensuring that the goals are realistic and attainable.
• 17:43: Parents should recognize and encourage their children's strengths and talents. Focusing on their strengths can boost their confidence and sense of accomplishment.
• 18:28: Parents should pay attention to their child's self-talk and intervene when they hear negative self-statements. By redirecting negative self-talk to more positive and supportive language, parents can help improve their child's self-esteem.
• 18:53: Instead of using generic phrases like "good job" or "nice work," be specific in your praise. Acknowledge the particular effort or accomplishment of the child.
• 20:02: Raun talks about the concept of "Family Self-Esteem Builder," an activity instigated by Marvin's grandma in the book.
• 22:44: Raun mentions other tools and activities from the book, such as the "Anti-Negativity Elixir," family coat of arms, and other practical approaches to help children learn about their strengths and boost their self-esteem. He encourages parents to try these tools, even though they might seem unconventional at first, as they can have a significant impact on a child's self-esteem and confidence.
• 24:04: Caroline mentions that some individuals may have had a good childhood but still struggle with self-esteem and mental health due to the stress and pressures of life.
• 26:07: Social media can play a role in affecting self-esteem, not necessarily because of the platform itself, but more so how individuals perceive and compare themselves to others.
• 29:51: Caroline mentions that children today face unique challenges, including awareness of safety concerns, like active shooter drills in schools, and exposure to political and social divisions.
• 32:01: Raun and Caroline emphasize the importance of being positive role models for children and instilling hope in them. They encourage parents to remain optimistic, address stress in healthy ways, and believe in the potential for positive change, even amidst the challenges of the modern world.

3 Key Points:

1. Raun discusses the effectiveness of the "Marvin's Monster Diary" series as a form of bibliotherapy for children, particularly focusing on self-esteem and typical problems that kids, including those with ADHD, may face.
2. Raun discusses the impact of chronic perfectionism on a child's well-being and socialization.
3. While many discussions about self-esteem and mental health often focus on childhood trauma or challenging relationships, Caroline points out that external stressors and the fast-paced nature of modern life can also contribute

Tweetable Quotes:

• "The characters in the series encounter challenges, and they practice the skills that the authors aim to impart to the readers. As the story progresses, the characters improve their behaviors, make more friends, and have happier families, demonstrating the positive impact of learning and growth." – Raun
• "Self-esteem is the capacity to feel good and comfortable with oneself. Children with good self-esteem have confidence in their worth, abilities, and self-respect. They can approach problems with self-assurance and handle their own experiences positively. When kids take on challenges and succeed, it greatly enhances their self-esteem." – Raun
• "It's important for parents to identify when their children have difficulty feeling sure of themselves or handling mistakes, as these may be signs of self-esteem issues." – Raun
• "Providing a schedule and setting expectations can help strike the right balance for optimal performance. They also emphasize the importance of having conversations with kindness and understanding to support the child's growth and well-being." - Caroline

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
• www.melmedcenter.com
• https://carolineblisslarsen.com/
• Podcast Editing