Helping Families Be Happy

Life-Changing Storytelling with Eileen the Storyteller

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly talks with Eileen, who is also known as Eileen the Storyteller. She will be talking about her beautiful work on YouTub. As an expert, Eileen will be sharing about the time she spends with children, and feedback she gets from parents about life-changing results from her storytelling.

Episode Highlights

• 1.28: Eileen is going to open up about all of life's vicissitudes and give feelings a language and strategies for moving forward because it's not always about happily ever after. It's also about the grit and the resilience and the oath that it takes to power through the not-so-happily-ever-after moments.
• 3.13: The power of messages that we hear from parents and educators get reflected in us and that really puts the fuel in our tank, and we feel very much like we are on a mission to bring something to kids that they need, says Eileen.
• 4.05 Eileen reads picture books for children, and she does it with her cast of puppet characters. The kids see themselves in these puppet kids and it adds the element of further deeper connection.
• 06.36: We could all learn a lot from reading more children's books, like how to play nice. And it's deep, It's not childlike. It's complex. 
• 08.23: Eileen loves helping families be happy through talking to really brilliant creative people like Carla who have found a way, especially with parents being so busy.
• 12.14: Eileen talks about the color and energy of the imagination that she helps foster in children's lives.
• 13.02: Being kind is not for the weak. It takes a lot of courage. To have a big open heart and to be kind and to be loving because they may not feel like it sometimes to the same scary. But we have to fight our fears when we know that we are able.
• 17.30: Eileen shares how children tend to gravitate toward what their psyche needs.
• 19.27: Funny is Eileen's absolute favorite thing, followed closely behind by magical books that do things that you don't expect.
• 21.49: Storytelling is as old as humanity, and that's what unites us to one another, to past generations, to the future, to ourselves, and to each other. That's the window for everything. 

3 Key Points

1. Eileen shares how she picks and selects children's books for reading. How over the last eight years Eileen and her husband have really gotten to know what children respond to?
2. Eileen shares some instances where her storytelling has positively impacted people's lives. 
3. Eileen talks about her inspiration to start her own channel.

Tweetable Quotes

• "I bring the books to life in a very theatrical way because the drama of life does connect and is contained in all children's books. You can see all the world's truths are in them." - Eileen 
• "I always make sure that whatever we read is super fun and funny. And I do seek out books that have zero nutritional value but just enjoyable, fun, repairing time to make sure that the love of reading is just brewing." - Eileen 
• "We do need to keep things magical. I don't think we should ever lose that." - Eileen
• "The more I delve deep into being a storyteller, the more I live in that world and the more comfortable I am being an adult who is completely open-hearted and fearless." – Eileen
• "Life is hard whether the kid is in a perfectly adjusted, beautiful home or a wreckage of a situation." - Eileen

 

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://www.youtube.com/@KidTimeStoryTime
• Podcast Editing

 

Conversations about Conservation with June Smalls

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly talks to June Smalls. She will be talking about her upcoming book, "Hear Them Roar: 14 Endangered Animals from Around the World". June shares how we do so many things naturally and can do more of them that mimic the animal world which would be really good for us. 

Episode Highlights

• 2.02: June talks about her love for reading and writing books at an early age. She got serious about sharing her work with the world back in 2013. That is when she joined the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators and started looking for critique groups. 
• 3.11: June talks about the book written by her - She Leads, that's part of a series. Then there is - He Leads which is about the mountain gorilla and then the follow-up book that will be out in the fall - They lead, which is about the Gray Wolf Pack. So, we have different leaders and different family structures throughout the animal kingdom.
• 05.14: June talks about her upcoming book and the research that she did and all challenges she faced. 
• 07.15: June makes the sound of a baby rhinoceros. She shares how they make they make little, tiny sounds that should be coming out of a much smaller animal.
• 08.15: June and Carla talk about poaching and how rhinos are endangered because of it. 
• 10.16: The best thing when we look at animal families is that we see that there is no one way to be a perfect family. And there are some animals that are solitary that are only with their parents for the first couple of years when they're growing and then they are solitary.  
• 12.18: June shares how as a family, there are so many different ways to be a family and to help each other.
• 13.19: As per Carla, we often forget in today's busy world, the importance of playing together. 
• 16.46: Childhood and families, sometimes they are messy, sometimes it's not always perfect, says June. 
• 17.21: June shares how reading a book together is a way to bond and a way to open and spark conversations. 
• 19.51: The good thing about nonfiction animal books, is we are going to mention that there is birth, which is beautiful, and there is death, which is hard, and there are struggles those animals don't always eat every day, and sometimes that can open a conversation about different animals. 
• 22.56: June talks about flying foxes and how they are endangered. They are megabats, but they are so important because they are just like butterflies and honeybees because they pollinate, they eat fruits, and they eat the nectar out of the flowers. 

3 Key Points

1. June explains how she sees books about families, animal families, extinct animals, and all of that as a package. How can the book make families happier? How does this impact families?
2. There is the capacity for us to not only see different ways of doing things through the animal world but realizing we can incorporate those into our own lives in beneficial ways because sometimes it does take more than a single mom or a mom and dad or a single dad to raise a child.
3. June shares some of the key lessons that she can offer to her listeners about the importance of reading for family, togetherness, family happiness, and having parent, child caregiver, and child reading together.

Tweetable Quotes

• "Some animals are so rare that even though we have had them in captivity, we don't have any recorded sounds for them." - June 
• "There are so many elements when we look at the animal world where they are working together while being part of a family, and it sounds like that makes these animals much happier." - Carla 
• "I would rather help support a child to be a B student who is happy and well-rounded than an A student who is stressed and anxious and unhappy." - June 
• "If you are afraid of bats, look up the flying fox eating a banana, then you will never be afraid of bats again." - June

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://junesmalls.com/
• Podcast Editing

 

Storytime as Community with Peter Limata

On today’s episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, talks with Peter Limata, who will be talking about story time. Peter discusses what happens in story time with Mr. Limata, and why is it so important? During story time, the whole idea is just to connect with books, introduce students and parents alike. The books that they are reading are not only for funny laughs, but they are books that deal with serious issues. 

Episode Highlights

• 1.30: Peter has taught first grade students the longest. He has also taught 2nd and 4th grade students. He then worked with after school programs at the first two years, after that moved to the US.
• 03.00: Peter explains how family-oriented country Zambia is. He shares instances, experiences and quotes that best describes Zambia. 
• 04.30: As per Peter, in US you become independent at an earlier age. There is more output and opportunities for employment and earning a living on your own. 
• 06.21: As per Dr. Carla, Zambia is doing a very good job of really creating a sense of family no matter where you are. 
• 7.56: Peter shares how he gets his inspiration from his mom who was an educator. 
• 9.44: Peter explains how being an administrator, allows you to see the bigger picture. He says that the people in the classrooms, the people that are working with the children, we need their input we need their voices, and we can't just be as administrators or as people.
• 11.40: Peter has live experience of the classroom, so he brings all of that to the administration or somebody who has only ever been administrator may not have that vantage point, says Carla. 
• 13.48: Peter shares how he enjoyed narrating stories to kids and what led him to launch story time in Facebook and YouTube. 
• 17.47: Carla mentions the beauties of picture books. She says the words can be used or they cannot be used, and you can create your own story and then talk. 
• 20.05: Peter shares how he has received positive feedback from families and how story time has helped people during the pandemic.
• 24.42: As adults engage in a true, genuine apology not only are we looking at the child and modeling for them, but children watch as we apologize to other adults. And so, a true genuine apology also offers us the room to grow and do it differently to move forward, says Carla.
• 26.21: When we are gentle, we can never underestimate the power for children and adults to be gentle. We can say almost anything no matter how pointed a message that it needs to be. But we can say it with kindness and gentleness, says Carla.
• 28.30: Let kids be kids, many times we try to have kids see the world through our lens, says Peter.

3 Key Points

1. Peter talks about his experience as an educator and administrator. He shares how the two are different. 
2. Peter talks about story time and how he makes or help families be happy through the power of story. 
3. Storytime is meant to support reading for kids and of course families reading together but also helping them have those conversations, says Peter. 

Tweetable Quotes

• “Today it's on your friend, tomorrow it's on you and usually it refers to something that is, some of your friend is struggling, don't laugh at them help them because you never know when your time comes on.” – Peter Limata
• “I am in this role because of the influences that I had from my mom who was an educator.” - Peter Limata
• “Decision makers make decisions in a vacuum. We need to bring in the people we need. And that's what has helped me just leaving the class last year and being an administrator now.” - Peter Limata
• “When I started storytime, I started it looking for a way to connect with my kids.” -  Peter Limata
• “I really have embraced it in, in a way that I never would have imagined. But it came about because as I was putting out content for story time, how do I reach more people, more kids, and so my idea was just to put out stuff. And then I started thinking, well, I have these events page on my Facebook that I will put up, but then I needed a way of highlighting those telling people what's coming next.” - Peter Limata
• “Apologies are a gift, so some people definitely steer clear of them, but I see them as a real bonus to everyone.” - Carla 
• “You can wire your brain whatever way you want to wire your brain. It can become part of who you are.” - Carla

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• Peter: Instagram | Website 
• Podcast Editing

 

Boundaries and Consent for Kids with Christine Babinec

On today’s episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, talks with Christine Babinec, who will be talking about her new book “Want a Hug? Consent and Boundaries for Kids”. Christine shares her views on when a boundary crossing has occurred. She answers the questions: How do we help a child? How do we empower them to come forward without shame, embarrassment, and guilt no matter how minor or major that boundary crossing is?

Episode Highlights

• 1.20: Christine’s practice is about combining prevention work and treatment within a social justice scope, and she is trying to figure out how can we prevent abuse and harm from happening in the world. How can we effectively treat it and make sure that we are bringing marginalized people and hearing the voices of the people who have been hurt?
• 4.55: As adults, sometimes we see a child and know the child needs an answer and sometimes the answer or explanation becomes very cerebral and wordy. But the children's books can be so perfect in giving us the simple, concise language that children can understand and process, says Carla. 
• 9.57: When you see your child not want to be hugged just have a lighthearted general conversation to get a beat and a read on what your kid is comfortable with in general because a lot of times we assume kids are soft and cuddly, but some of them just aren't and they don't like to have that foisted on them.
• 11.13: We often don't talk to kids about how you can show kindness and love and generosity and affection without physical contact, says Christine.
• 12.21: Carla believes in talking to the relatives in advance saying. She is working on boundaries at home. So, if the little one is showing signs of having strong boundaries, please applaud them and respect that they're learning how to take that with them through life.
• 14.49: Christine also encourages grown-ups to not apologize when their child doesn't want to give a hug or cuddle because this may communicate to the child that they might have done something wrong, or it gives them a mixed message.
• 17.28: One of the things that Christine have made addressed in the book is that a lot of kids are very afraid that they are going to get in trouble because that's what perpetrators do when they convince the child that they have done something wrong.
• 19.40: Sometimes it's later that you realize, that happened and that shouldn't have happened or didn't feel right and then children and adults tend to feel guilty for not having stopped it right then and there, says Carla. 
• 21.14: There could be a power differential even between a much larger child and a much smaller child in the same grade, Christine.
• 23.20: In slippery slopes, there is not a clear demarcation of when the hug turned into something that was much more inappropriate. Christine shares her views on how she would coach parents to help themselves or maybe forgive themselves and help them explain to their child.
• 24.40: We want to live in a world where we teach our kids that they are grown-ups and that they can trust, and that the world is a safe place. But then we also have to talk to them about certain realities.
• 27.34: Your instinct could be crystal clear on a lot of different things. But when you have complex emotions and complex relationships involved, this is where Christine worries that people will blame themselves that she should have had an instinct.
• 28.56: If your instinct comes up, pay attention to it and notice it. If you override your instinct or didn't get an instinct on and something happens, never blame yourself.
• 30.27: Christine’s book is to set the foundation for healthy boundaries, learning about consent in naturalistic, developmentally appropriate ways that are fun and engaging and stuff that child is already doing now.

3 Key Points

1. When we have conversations with kids and the material is approachable everything changes. It sets the foundation to have more complicated conversations later, and it opens the developmentally appropriate ways for them, says Christine.
2. We want to empower kids to say no, but we have to remember kids are not responsible for protecting themselves, says Christine.
3. Silence is not consent. Persuasion is not consent. Consent is only present when it's freely given, reversible, informed, enthusiastic and specific, says Christine.

Tweetable Quotes

• “We do all great work to set the foundation for consent and boundaries, and then we don't explicitly talk about it in terms of bodies and relationships.” – Christine
• “The developmentally appropriate way is so critical because if we are either speaking beneath the child's level or over a child's level, we're missing an opportunity for attunement.” - Carla
• “Consent and boundaries are the foundations of all healthy relationships is my favorite line. But upon reflection, my favorite line from the book is, it's not my fault.” – Christine
• “70s and 80s were all about stranger danger because we don't like to think about the fact that often when abuse happens, it's from someone we know.” – Christine

 

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://www.christinebabineclpc.com/
• Podcast Editing

Picture Books for All with Charlotte Offsay

In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly is going to talk to Charlotte Offsay. She will be talking about her work with Instagram and her literacy platform.

 

Episode Highlights

• 1.33: Instagram is a wonderful space and community where people share the books that they are interested in, the books that they are reading, and she makes recommendations based on the books that her children and she loves.
• 2.05: Books are a fabulous way to enter a conversation with a child and discuss what's going on in their minds and enter naturally into a conversation.
• 4.35: As per Carla, we still have picture books as adults, and we just call them photography books and images share so much.
• 5.19: Carla explains as an Instagram influencer why does she think it's important to read together for family happiness?
• 6.30: On emotional level, reading together brings calmness and tranquility to the end of our day. It can definitely lead to lots of giggles and fun and silliness too, says Charlotte.
• 8.16: Being immersed in the kid-lit world, Charlotte gets to see so many of the new books coming out and it gets to meet the wonderful authors that she works and writes and interacts with.
• 9.47: Through the picture books Charlotte got a window into what else is going on around the world like traditions or cultures she and her children both got to experience that together.
• 10.43: Reading and interacting and looking at a book offers a way to explore curiosity and see it in a different light and slow down.
• 12.44: When you find a piece in a book that you can identify with and say that person is like me, it's one of the most precious parts of reading, says Carla.
• 14.08: Charlotte is lucky to get books sent to her by fabulous publishers, and she just absolutely loves getting a stack of new picture books and pouring over them and getting excited to share them with her kids and with people who she has gotten to know online.
• 16.02: There are the small everyday moments that also need to be celebrated and recognized, says Charlotte.
• 18.15: There are so many different types of books out there and there is something for everyone and that can be a such a wonderful experience for everyone, says Charlotte.

3 Key Points

1. Picture books are meant to be read a loud and meant to be shared in a special way and they offer a unique connection, says Charlotte.
2. Every child wants and needs to see and deserves to see themselves reflected in the pages of a book, says Charlotte.
3. Charlotte's next book A Grandma's Magic is a lyrical ode to the magic of the relationship and all that a grandma brings into our lives through the small moments.

Tweetable Quotes

• "Young children need literacy and books, and books offer windows and mirrors and discussion points."- Charlotte
• "The more that you read, the more you're going to teach and share and open up a young child's world." – Charlotte
• "From skin color to eye color to body size to pets, it's so wonderful to see someone who's life mirrors yours." – Carla
• "I tend to write about the things in my life that consume me, whether that's my children or me and what's going on with them." - – Charlotte

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• http://charlotteoffsay.com/
• https://www.instagram.com/picturebookrecommendations/?hl=en
• Podcast Editing

Teach Your Family to Read (Even the Dog!) with Susan Holt Simpson

In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California talks with Susan Holt Simpson. Today they are going to talk about how to help children learn to love reading. Susan also shares tips to inculcate reading into a child's life.

Episode Highlights

• 03.30: Susan Holt Simpson is a freelance writer living in Northern Kentucky. She volunteers as a reading coach with the Kentucky one-to-one children's literacy program. Her jittery spotted dog inspired her to write and teach your dog to read.
• 2.46: Susan is going to share her insights on teaching children how to read. She gives a few hints for early reading and what parents need. How early should parents start? 
• 3.12: As per Susan children can learn to recognize somebody's reading even before they are born. 
• 04.02: As per Susan, parents can begin reading, during pregnancy and that can have an impact.
• 04.48: It is easy to just read aloud, even during feeding times, to get out those board books that you got at your baby shower and just read them to your children while they are feeding, while they are in their highchair, even during bath time putting on audiobook, especially of Mother Goose of rich rhyme and textured stories and books is good. 
• 06.02: Buying a book is not the only way to put together a library for your kids. You can also opt for secondhand resale for charity. Just searching through those resale thrift stores will have children's books for very reasonable prices. 
• 08.40: Susan talks about her love to go to libraries and wander around books. Special books are often set on top of the library shelves by the librarians because they see the value in some of these books too.
• 09.56: You can experience that New York Times has the same wonderful journals that provide great lists that you can experience if you are trying to build a beginning library. 
• 10.45: Susan prefers to buy real books for her kids and grandkids. Whenever she gets a chance.
• 12.02: Susan Shares that to spike the interest of elementary students, make sure that they are reading and the book that they are presented with is tailored to their interest. 
• 14.02: Instead of choosing books that start with their activity interest, present a book that has something that will lead you to an activity that everybody will enjoy and that will inspire more reading. 
• 15.08: Launchpad books are books that are going to launch your little guy into an interest-based activity.
• 17.00: Christopher talks about how he and his wife have opened the world of reading to their children. 

3 Key Points

1. Susan shares her thoughts on whether one should build a library for their children as they grow from newborns to toddlers to early readers to chapter readers and so on. 
2. Susan shares tips about what to do in order to help children reengage or continue their love of learning during elementary years when their world is expanding. 
3. Susan shares how she encourages people to be really natural with the way that they present reading to their children.

Tweetable Quotes

• "We can expose children to books, wherever they are, whatever they are doing." - Christopher  
• "I am a book buyer, I love going to bookstores that is an important part of the way that we acquire books for our kids and now for our grandkids to make sure that we are buying those really good quality, beautiful books that will be treasured." - Susan 
• "I do look at lists online, there are a lot of people with lists. But you know, what I like to do is I love to go to the library and just kind of wander around those beautiful books. 
• "So many of our children are now reading on any device that they happen to have." - Christopher  
• "You can encourage anyone to read in, regardless of what medium that they like." – Susan
• "Rather than be too concerned about their expanding universe complement their expanding universe with books that align with their expanded universe." - Susan

Resources Mentioned

• Susan's Book
• https://susanholtsimpson.com/
• Podcast Editing

Mental Health for Mom with Rebecca Fox Starr

In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California talks with guest Rebecca Fox Starr, an author, writer, Blogger, speaker, and mental health advocate. She created her internationally read blog "Mommy Ever After" in 2010 following the birth of her first child when she became pregnant with her second child in 2013. Rebecca suffered from prenatal anxiety and depression and subsequent severe postpartum depression. She decided to document her journey in real time in an effort to help others.

Episode Highlights

• 1.07: Rebecca writes candidly about her life as a mother, survivor, advocate, singer-songwriter, dance partier, and studded shoe collector. Her story has been featured in the New York Times, Huffington Post, on ABC News, and all forms of media across the world. 
• 03.43: Maternal mental health is just mental health feelings, emotions, and diagnosis. But for mothers, for those who are trying to conceive, pregnant or have children. 
• 04.45: Rebecca talks about motherhood and what drove her to start her first blog.
• 05.07: Rebecca shares how she tackles postpartum depression post giving birth to her second child. 
• 06.58: For Rebecca writing was the greatest therapy. When feeling down, nervous, depressed, she used writing as a medium to get out of it. 
• 08.24: As treacherous as the landscape of social media can be, there is also something that is amazing about the exposure, because now people are used to sharing things about their lives and it's become easier, sometimes even attractive, or desirable, says Rebecca.
• 08.56: As per Rebecca, because people are talking more and connecting more because we are all so much more connected through social media. 
• 11.26: Rebecca shares how motherhood is the greatest joy in the world, but it is also the hardest phase. 
• 12.05: As per Rebecca, everyone has negative feelings, and just like it's in her book, negative feelings come. We don't have to pretend that they don't exist. We need to be resilient and know that we are sad or lonely or scared. But just like storms, they these feelings pass. 
• 14.02: For moms in particular, 25% of moms or 30% of moms are diagnosed with a perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. 
• 15.46: Rebecca talks about the therapeutic way of positive thinking and how it can help to get over anxiety and depression.
• 17.21: For someone with depression validation is important, says Rebecca.
• 18.45: As per Rebecca, support is the key to success, and she has done a lot of research on postpartum depression screening and diagnosis. She is not a clinician, but she has done a lot of research and written academic books on this.
• 20.11: A lot of times people who are going through especially a parental mood and anxiety disorder, postpartum depression, they are thinking that they should feel better or that they are bad parent for feeling the way that they do.
• 21.10: Christopher has found out that saying how can I help you is not as helpful as just helping.
• 21.46: Rebecca shares for those who are in the book world, what does she hopes that the publishing industry in the book industry can do to help improve mental health awareness? 

3 Key Points

1. Rebecca shares how writing has helped her to crawl out of her depression post giving birth to her second child. Writing is how she connects with people, so finding people to connect with was incredibly healing.
2. Rebecca talks about her book, Mommy Ever After, how does that relate to mental health and why was that book important for her to write? 
3. To use business terms, somebody who reaches out to a friend once a week, the return on investment is so great. You have a 30% less chance to experience depression or to sink down into a deeper depression and just by being checked in on, says Rebecca. 

Tweetable Quotes

• "In 2013-2014 people didn't talk about mental health the same way that they do now. Not as openly, not as compassionately." – Rebecca
• "Sharing about postpartum depression has been, as I said, the greatest. Pivot and ultimately gift in my life." - Rebecca
• "Actually, starting to write was the most healing thing that I did. And over the course of the next several years, as I crawled out of that hole of anxiety and depression, I knew that if I got that feeling, feeling down, feeling nervous, feeling depressed, writing was the greatest therapy." - Rebecca 
• "When I started writing about postpartum depression, my first two books were academic texts. There was not a big list of books on postpartum depression and. There is no book on trying to expand your family after postpartum depression, so I wrote it because there was nothing there." – Rebecca
• "For me, Mommy ever after, is this whimsical book with the most gorgeous illustrations." -Rebecca
• "We encourage our audience, if anyone is experiencing acute anxiety or debilitating depression, to make sure that they get proper professional medical care to help them as they navigate this one of these life challenges." - Christopher

Resources Mentioned

• Rebecca's Book
• www.mommyeverafter.com
• Instagram https://www.instagram.com/rebeccafoxstarr/?hl=en
• Podcast Editing

 

The Physical and Mental Benefits of Family Dinner with The Family Dinner Project

In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks Brianne DeRosa, MFA, is the Content Manager for The Family Dinner Project. As a freelance writer and consultant to nonprofit organizations, she has spent over a decade working in communications, program development and creative initiatives. Brianne has the opportunity to practice her family dinner skills every day with her husband and two young sons. Today they are going to explore how to improve family dinner and why that is so important in today's busy world.

Episode Highlights

• • 1.02: Brianne talks about changes in family dinners pre and post covid. As per her, pre covid, majority of families, majority of parents would say particularly that family dinner was important, that they wanted to have family dinner and 80% of teenagers would say that they wished they could eat dinner with their parents more often.
  • 03.13: During pre-covid fewer than 30% of families were making it to the table together on any kind of regular basis, which was concerning.
  • 03.56: During Covid, what Brianne found was kind of interesting; they did some research with their friends at making caring common, which is part of the graduate Harvard Graduate School of Education and what the research uncovered was that during the first year of the pandemic, when there were a lot of lockdowns and people were home more family dinner is improved, so more than 50% of respondents said not only were they having dinner much more frequently, but their dinners were more enjoyable.
  • 04.30: During Covid, kids were feeling more empowered to cook and be a part of the family dinner experience, and that made everybody feel good.
  • 06.52: The family dinner project is a nonprofit program of mass General Hospital psychiatry Academy and as per Brianne it is based on the principle of looking at the decades and decades and decades of deep scientific research that has proven that family dinner is an important part of life, an important available daily intervention. 
  • 07.54: As per Brianne young kids in particular who eat with their families develop storytelling, sequencing and vocabulary skills even greater than if they were simply read to.
  • 08.33: There are a whole host of benefits for adults that are now coming to light through new research where older adults who eat with someone else, whether that is a family member or a friend, if they have regular shared meal interactions with people, they have better mental health. Their loneliness decreases, which is a huge public health crisis for older, older adults is loneliness that decreases, their nutrition increases.

• 09.23: Brianne shares how does the family dinner project, help people inculcate family dinner into their lifestyle? 

• 11.12: Bri shares how they are working with experts at mass general to create a whole youth sports and family dinner section of their website specifically targeted to those challenges. They also have a new initiative called the Welcoming Table that they have been working on with a variety of experts that specifically targeted towards the challenges that come with having family members who are on the autism spectrum or have ADHD or have feeding challenges, sensory challenges, if those are barriers to any family meals, they are also targeting towards that. 
• 14.30: In many households, if not most, there is one person who is basically responsible for the planning, shopping, cooking and cleanup. A lot of time it's a female head of household, kind of singular person who has the whole mantle of responsibility. And one of the things that makes family dinner feel so scary and onerous is there isn't that division of labor, that opportunity to cook together, that opportunity to have people help clean up or even just to help meal plan and shop. 
• 18.19: The Family Dinner Project's goal is if you could help a family overcome their family dinner challenges, if you could inspire a family to have more dinners together, they wanted that thing that you could hand to them and say look here is how you do it.
• 21.11: Sometimes parents are able to get together with their kids for a few minutes between school and sports practice. If you take that moment to have some apple slices and cheese and talk, then you have done a family meal, says Brianne.
• 23.10: Anytime that you are sharing food, fun, and conversation in any format with anybody who's important to you, that can confer some of the same benefits as what we think of as this kind of Norman Rockwell dinner experience, says Brianne.
• 25.40: As per Brianne one of the most undervalued things about family dinner is that opportunity that it presents for people to just unwind and laugh together and have a good time. 

3 Key Points

1. Brianne explains what is the family dinner project and why is this so meaningful and so important? 
2. Brianne talks about the family dinner book that they have introduced. As per her there are all these different challenges in the book that that they are trying to help solve through presenting the stories of real families who have managed it. What has their challenge been? How have they overcome it? They have smart strategies. Real people have really good ideas. 
3. As per Brianna its ok to have a split shift dinner as long as everyone has someone to eat and interact with, that's a family meal. 

Tweetable Quotes

• "Having somebody else in the house will help you with dinner might actually make you feel better about dinner." -  Brianne
• "Family dinner is a relatively accessible intervention for most people, it's something that they could potentially do. But it's not simple and so the family dinner project, we always say that the research exists to tell us why dinner is important, but we exist to help you with the how." - Brianne
• "I would say to that family and to every other family out there, one thing to remember is we're the family dinner project. But it doesn't have to be dinner, it's any opportunity where you can connect meaningfully and purposefully around food, fun and conversation so it can be a family breakfast." - Brianne

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://thefamilydinnerproject.org/|Instagram|
• Podcast Editing

Being the Odd Duck with Stephanie Campisi

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly talks with guest Stephanie Campisi. She will be talking with us about her wonderful new book, Quacks Like a Duck.

 

Episode Highlights

• 1.41: Opportunity presented itself, so Stephanie moved to the US from Australia in 2014 and she has been having a wonderful time. 
• 1.51: Throughout her travels, Stephanie has been collecting interesting stories and overheads and snippets and turning them into books.
• 2.07: Stephanie has lived in quite a few states in the US and has traveled almost half of now and working on the rest.
• 3.53: Reading and writing are how Stephanie makes sense of the world, and she thinks it's so true for so many people even if you are not necessarily an author, but you write letters or things like that.
• 5.15: Stephanie looks at the recurring motives that shine through because she has several books out through Familius and tends to be loved together, laugh together, and play together.
• 7.33: Stephanie's perspective has been really interesting in Australia and being an Australian and what that identity is now that she is elsewhere.
• 8.35: Stephanie has been taking Vegemite to the US schools and having brave souls try it and it's always hilarious. They eat Vegemite to keep their vitamins up.
• 11.10: The essence of relationship is when we can take a topic and start dissecting it whether it is about books or some little curiosities, says Carla. 
• 12.11: Stephanie mostly travels around the schools in rural Eastern Tennessee and in a lot of cases she is the first author that the kids have met and so it's wonderful.
• 13.40: There has been a little bit of time in the making quacks, but Stephanie does have a book in the work that hopefully will be on shelves and is absolutely inspired by her son who is three years old.
• 15.15: When Stephanie came from another country and made a new home in America, that belonging, and acceptance were a big piece for her. She shares if her books somehow create more of a sense of belonging and acceptance in her life or not.
• 17.35: When Stephanie came to the US, it was kind of like a single-swim situation.
• 19.41: Social-emotional learning helps kids learn how to get along with each other and make friends, create healthy relationship dynamics, and learn to exist alongside each other in the world. 
• 20.12: Quacks like a duck is a brand-new release and it's not actually about a duck. It is about Petunia the platypus who shows up at her very first party in the US, says Stephanie. 
• 22.10: Sometimes we want to label everything. We want to put something in a box so that we are comfortable knowing what this is, says Carla.
• 26.22: Books are really safe way to explore little things with children, particularly if you are with a trusted adult who can help you work through them.
• 27.18: In Quacks Like a Duck, we have petunia going to her party but that applies in so many different situations where you're the new person in an unfamiliar situation and that can apply to kids in so many different experiences throughout their lives, says Stephanie.
• 29.00: Stephanie feels picture books give us permission to be kids again and feel like that is one of the joys of being a picture book author.

3 Key Points

1. Stephanie talks about her journey and what motivated her to become an author.
2. You feel yourself and what you are meant to be at Familius and that's why we gravitated towards Familius. The energy at Familius is very loving, very inclusive, and very family oriented, says Stephanie.
3. Different people can approach the same book, but nobody is ever going to approach it in the same way. We are in different moods when we are reading the book, says Stephanie.

Tweetable Quotes

• "Your reading and writing passion helps you bring components to life, in your body, in your mind and spirit." - Carla
• "It is really beautiful that there is some energy that brings people to Familius because that energy is like let's create books that help make the world a better place." – Carla
• "Once you get outside the familiar bubble of comfort, you have a different lens to see and understand everything." - Stephanie
• "Social-emotional learning lens is authenticity for how to embrace your truth, know who you are, stand in your truth, and not need to dress up. You can just be yourself." - Carla
• "When we are connecting with the child, we are also connecting to lost or thirsty parts of ourselves, and their books work in a way that more the 500 pages book can't do." - Carla

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
• Stephanie Campisi: Website
• Podcast Editing

 

How to Improve Our Mental Health with Dr. Ben Bernstein

In today’s episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Christopher Robbins, Co-founder of Familius Publishing (A Husband, Father, Author, Fisherman, Backpacker, and Aspirational Musician based in the Central Valley of California) talks with guest Dr. Ben Bernstein (A veteran Psychologist, Educator, Keynote Speaker, Author, and a Performance Coach for Academy Award, Tony Award and Pulitzer Prize winners. His client lists include CEOs, Dentists, Athletes, Attorneys, Physicians, Business Executives, Opera Singers, and Actors). You can reach Dr. Bernstein at his website -- https://www.drbyourbest.com/.  Today Dr. Bernstein talks about the ways to improve our mental health. 

Episode Highlights

• 01:40 – Dr. Bernstein is the Founder and Artistic Director of the ‘Singer’s Gym’, a nonprofit training workshop for professional singers that have vitality, spontaneity, and connection in their work. 
• 04:00 - Dr. Bernstein says that he is deeply a person of prayer and a man of religious practice, but you don't have to have a religion to have a spirit, because everyone has a spirit. 
• 05:40 - There's a reason that all the sages and saints for 1000s of years have been talking about the breath because it's a real vital connection from vitality.
• 08:00 - A very healthy thing to do for your mental health is to appreciate somebody in your life daily. Appreciating means expressing gratitude to someone in your life and then expressing gratitude to them.
• 10:00 - Dr. Ben heard a philosopher on the radio say once, “We're built to be givers, not takers”.
• 12:00 - You wouldn't even be here today if it was purely negative. There always is a positive side, we were not created thinking we are a loser.
• 14:00 – Christopher summarizes what all Dr. Bernstein spoke about during the episode.
• 16:25 - Dr. Ben says that we do have different kinds of mental conditions that are diagnosable, however, in his practice, and in his life he has dealt with so many of these, even in the most difficult circumstances through love. 

Three Key Points

1. Mental health is one part of our overall health, however, Dr. Bernstein uses three-legged stool which is body, mind, and spirit. When we talk about mental health, we seem to be focusing only on the mind but we are also a body and a spirit. When all three legs are equally strong, our mental health becomes equally strong too. Mental health also depends upon our physical, and spiritual health. Dr. Bernstein says that wherever we construe spirit, he views it as a motivating force. So, Dr. Ben speaks a little bit about the health of each of the three facts. The most important is to help your mind through your body is to get connected through your body to the world.
2. Dr. Bernstein mentions that he has a radical view about the definition of mental health which is that mental disturbance unless it's a genetic or a brain disorder, it's always a disturbance of some kind of love. We're meant as human beings to give to each other to prove our love to give. When we pull away from that, we're often in a state of fear or anger. As a result, we cut ourselves off from the connection that we all have and we all need from each other.
3. It's all about positive connection, the more connected your body is, and the more connected you are to others, to nature, or the more you appreciate people, the more mental health you will have.

Tweetable Quotes

• “The thing you missed is that 3 of those books were published by Familius.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “October is a Mental Health Awareness Month.” - Christopher Robbins
• “When you hold your breath, the message that your brain is getting is that you're dying.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “Ground yourself right now, grounding means feeling the chair support, you feeling the floor support, we really get out of touch.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “The spirit connection in the spirit has two parts to it.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “Appreciation we know from lots of research has a lot to do with mental health, so that's one thing I would recommend.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “Looking at your thoughts about yourself is really super important.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein
• “I think we're all here to serve one another.” - Dr. Ben Bernstein

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families be Happy Podcast  Apple

• Dr. Ben Bernstein Website Instagram LinkedIn Facebook Twitter
• Podcast Editing