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With help from guest authors, experts, and community and business leaders, the Familius Helping Families Be Happy podcast explores topics and issues that connect families to the nine habits of a happy family: love, play, learn, work, talk, heal, read, eat, and laugh together.
Episodes
Wednesday May 17, 2023
Wednesday May 17, 2023
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing clinical psychologist, wellness advocate, and author based in Sonoma County, California talks to Justin Black who will talk about his book Redefining Normal: How to Foster Kids Beat the Odds and Discovered Healing Happiness, and Love. Among other things. Justin is an author, serial entrepreneur, and husband.
Episode Highlights
- 01.40: As authors of Redefining Normal we talked about how generational trauma has impacted so much of our lives for our grandparents and for our parents and had a large impact on our life, says Justin.
- 03:27: It takes intentionality to combat something that is not beneficial for us mentally, spiritually, or physically when are sad and habits that were passed down to us by parents or who are around us that influence over us.
- 06:31: If you walk into a room and there is like a terrible smell, when you first hit you like, these smells terrible. But if you sit in that room for days or for weeks and you sit for months, you don't even smell anything anymore, says Justin.
- 06:45: As per Justin people have exercised a lot of unhealthy practices and habits from the generation of domestic violence and drug abuse and really relied on unhealthy habits and substances to really heal us or kind of put a band-aid on the things that they dealt with that were hard in our life.
- 08.38: Justin had so many amazing mentors and people who were successful around him. In a group home Justin was able to see other successful black men around him and it really changed his perspective.
- 10:19 Justin talks about his book Redefining Normal: How to Foster Kids Beat the Odds and Discovered Healing Happiness, and Love.
- 11:05: If a person only sees and experiences so much in their life then a lot of times, they are subjected to living that out, says Justin.
- 12:48: We continue to tell our family stories and our lives as testimonies on how we can be intentional about breaking generational trauma and barriers, says Justin.
- 14:23: One of the things that Justin wanted to build on with his young family is trying to make sure our environment is always fun and engaging, no matter the circumstances or situation. We're always engaging.
- 14:50: Create an environment where we can be open, honest, and loving to each other and have fun. Work on being there for each other as much as we can because you want to be intentional about just nurturing the relationships, creating the atmosphere of playfulness and engagement, says Justin.
- 19:49: As per Justin when it comes to mental and emotional stress, he and his partner try to do less pushing and less approaches of empathy, because these things are so serious.
- 21:30: Justin wants to just encourage leaders to love and how love and leadership are interconnected, and can't be separated. You can't love without leadership, and you can't be a leader without love.
3 Key Points
- Justin's foster experiences weren't necessarily always positive and in fact highly destructive in some ways but his support group, including his church, really gave him guideposts to help him change his life.
- In his book, Justin says that if you are going for foster care or in circumstances in life that you seemingly are out of control, even if it's just the 1% that you can't control, it can make an impact on how can you do the best with that and how that makes a drastic difference in your life and your future outcomes.
- Love is about service and not just only receiving. Love is about action and not only feeling and being super intentional around the ideas of love and how we can be super intentional about giving and receiving love.
Tweetable Quotes
- "We are super intentional on how we can build a healthy foundation so we can produce healthy food for our children and those around us." - Justin
- "We always have choices in life as we can go down a path of least resistance and being our worst selves or something had happened to us that helps us go down a path where we become our best selves." – Carla
- "Internal locus of control means that wherever I end up in life, the things that I do, I won't blame, or I won't say that my life circumstances will result in other people's actions or won't be other people's fault. It will be on me for my success and my stability." - Justin
- "I don't think we understand how much of our identity come from two people coming together and deciding to have a child." - Justin
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
- Familius.com
- https://www.re-definingnormal.com/
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday May 10, 2023
Wednesday May 10, 2023
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host, Ashley Marie Mireles, Director of Sales and Marketing for Families Publishing, author, and DEI leader. Today Ashley is going to talk to Heidi Poelman, author of Women in Science Who Changed the World and other Courageous People books.
Episode Highlights:
- 01:02: Today Ashley and Heidi are going to discuss the creation of women in science teaching the world.
- 01:46: Science is so interesting and so fun, and we have kind of an issue in our country where a lot of the times we give girls the message that science and mathematics and technology are more masculine subjects, more subjects for boys, says Heidi.
- 03:01: Heidi talks about a few amazing women that she came across while doing research for her book.
- 03:50: Heidi mentions Janaki Amal, who is an Indian scientist who did a lot to create a plant that could grow sugar in India because, before that time, they couldn't.
- 04:00: Wang Zhenyi learned more about lunar eclipses and what a cool girl at the time, people thought that lunar eclipses were the cause of angry gods, but she thought otherwise. She learned that the moon, the earth, and the sun all interacted to create something.
- 05:06: As per Heidi it is really upsetting to see some of the very strong and knowledgeable women getting noticed.
- 07:01: Heidi talks about her inspiration and from where she gets it.
- 07:33: Heidi talks about the first female president of the New York Cancer Society, and she was also the 1st woman and only African American on the board.
- 08:30: One of the big takeaways that we are getting from here is that children and just people, in general, need good examples to look up as long as you have someone inspiring you or you have something inspiring you, you can keep moving forward.
- 09:12: As part of the series, the first book that Heidi wrote was just a book about a few people that she loved and looked up to who did courageous things, and who wanted to make a difference in the world.
- 11:04: Heidi shares how she loves quotes and she also shares a quote that she wrote before the podcast.
- 12:25: Heidi explains why she mentioned Marie Curie in her book.
- 13:43: Heidi's goal is to teach young girls about perseverance and curiosity and just wonder and discovery and problem-solving, and just remind them that the things that they do make a difference and that even one person can be part of making the world a better place.
3 Key Points:
- Heidi shares why in her book she has featured women that aren't normally featured in kids' books, women from around the world, and women who maybe people haven't heard of before.
- Heidi shares how she wanted to inspire young girls from a very early age.
- Heidi talks about her series of books and the idea behind writing those.
Tweetable Quotes:
- "It's not necessarily the names and the facts, but this idea that curiosity and questions and problem-solving are all these really great values that we want to show to these young girls. How many times we talk to our little girls about, hey, let's go outside and just study bugs, or have you ever asked hey, do you know that there was a woman behind sending the first man to orbit the earth in space?" – Heidi
- "Jane Wright was fairly young she saw that cancer was a problem, and so she set her mind on doing something. So she just started researching. She decided that she wanted to be a doctor." - Heidi
- "I worked on a book about animals, famous animals who have made a difference and just had fun stories." – Heid
- "It's an important and fun time to work with young kids and to tell them stories of real heroes and not just knowing their names and what they did, but knowing what we can learn from them." - Heidi
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
- Familius.com
- Heidi Poelman
- Ashley Marie Mireles: LinkedIn
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday May 03, 2023
Wednesday May 03, 2023
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly is going to talk to Terry Whalin. He will be talking with us about many things, including his new book proposals that sell.
Episode Highlights:
- 01:01: Terry loves books and loves publishing and that's something he started at a very young age.
- 02:58: Terry shares how the book "Jesus Be A revolutionary" changed his whole view in life.
- 04:10: Terry shares how he joined Wycliffe Bible Translators out of college, and he spent 17 years with them.
- 04:33: Terry explains how he had a genuine love and relationship with God that he didn't have, and so that's why he needed to get a Bible and begin to sing those songs and go that direction in his life as well.
- 05:08: In Terry's publishing life. He has written biographies on people like Billy Graham and Chuck Colson and John Perkins and Luis Palau, and people like that.
- 05:24: Terry has co-authored books with more than a dozen people over the years, so books have really driven a lot of his life.
- 06:14: Terry had written about 50 books for traditional publishers, but he had never worked inside a publishing company before.
- 06:23: About 15-16 years ago, Terry was hired as the acquisition's editor at David C Cook in Colorado Springs and it gave him a look inside publishing that he had never seen before.
- 07:31: Terry wrote book proposals that sold originally in 2004, just as a frustrated editor because he wasn't getting the kind of submissions from authors that he really needed then.
- 09:12: As far as who the audience is, what they are going to do to sell the book, all those kinds of things, you can't just write a book.
- 10:05: There are over 4500 new books that are published every day. A publishing plan will help you not to get lost in 4500 books per day. It will help you float to the top rather than sink to.
- 11:23: If you have a plan, execute your plan, then that's where you are going to find your readers out there and really help people with the stuff you are putting in your books.
- 12:12: Terry has published more than a dozen children's books, and he knows that that's a very important area to people as parents read those books.
- 14:04: Terry shares how he benefitted from reading books to his children.
- 15:48: Terry wants to encourage authors to envision where their book is in the bookstore.
3 Key Points:
- Terry explains how to get a book launched or why their favorite book was launched.
- Terry shares how publishing has changed a lot since 2004.
- Terry's mission is to store enjoyment by helping authors be successful, and he is one of the reasons every book needs a book proposal out there.
Tweetable Quotes:
- "One of the things that really drives me day in, and day out is the fact that books can change people's lives." – Terry
- "I can think of many times in my life when the right book came across my path and gave me sometimes, I wanted, sometimes I not so much wanted, i.e.; a wakeup call." - Terry
- "We go to the library or the bookstore and come back with a whole bunch of books and read them over and over to our kids." - Terry
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
- Familius.com
- Terry Whalin
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday Apr 19, 2023
Wednesday Apr 19, 2023
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing clinical psychologist, Wellness advocate, and author based in Sonoma County, California talks to Megan Alms. She will be talking with us about her upcoming book Creature From the Woods.
Episode Highlights
- 01:44: Megan talks about her freelance journey and what motivated her to write a picture book.
- 03:00: Megan shares how her sister inspired her to write the book Creature From the Woods.
- 03:30: Megan shares how she gravitated toward being a big sister and being part of her imaginary world.
- 06:50: Megan's big message through her book is a focus on unconditional love. It's a fun little book to read and go through all the rhymes and act out all the motions.
- 07:58: The deer fawn taking timid steps was really this adult figure in Megan's life watching her take chances and take and learn these new things, and the owl was curious and wanted to learn new things.
- 09:06: The book talks about emotional intelligence and relationship building. Just reading through it can help bring back childhood memories.
- 10:57: Carla recalls her reading experience with her parents. She has memories of laughing; her parents used to read, and they tripped over their words a little bit and they would just laugh and laugh.
- 11:48: Megan talks about tenderness and wanting to cling to childhood moments.
- 13:29: Sometimes quietness gives you a chance to sit and think and commit to memories.
- 14:21: When we read to a child, we are giving that gift of tenderness to the child and to ourselves, says Meghan.
- 17:10: Meghan shares how knowing the characters of the kid's show brings them together as a family.
- 19:07: Reading together shows love in several different ways, all at the same time.
3 Key Points
- As per Megan, her book is something that kids can look back on once they have grown up and seen various messages and fully understand.
- Meghan explains how she focuses on unconditional love and helps readers to relive memories.
- For kids and for families, it is important to find those love languages, the things that make them feel loved, and know what things make them come alive because you don't have to have all the same hobbies. But there is something about genuinely caring about a passion or a way of loving each other.
Tweetable Quotes
- "I started getting all of these ideas for all of the different fun things that I enjoyed reading when I was that age and things that I wanted to share with my sister because at the time she was a toddler, and she loved pretending she loved to pretend to be different animals." - Megan Alms
- "Your parents created that piece of reading together from very early on in your life." - Carla Marie
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
- Megan Alms: Instagram Website
- Familius: Instagram Facebook Shop
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday Apr 12, 2023
Wednesday Apr 12, 2023
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Noah benShea, one of North America's most respected and beloved poet philosophers. He has the Pulitzer Prize-nominated and internationally best-selling author of 29 books translated into 18 languages, embraced around the world. Today they will discuss the duality of despair and hope from his most recent book - The Surfer and the Sage: A Guide to Surviving and Ride Life's Waves.
Episode Highlights
- 02:15: Life is a great party to which you have been invited. Now you have to decide what you want to wear to the party. The first thing to remember is that you get to choose not only from your clothing wardrobe but also from your emotional wardrobe.
- 02:58: Despair and hope are options that each has in each of their moments. Being filled with despair is not necessarily a flaw.
- 03:19: Those in the military remind us that hope is not a plan, and they are right. But from hope, a move to the positive can be planned.
- 03:40: Despair is not designer clothing more is it meant to be worn every day. However hope is a superhero cloak that on the tough days and even on the easy days, can shield you from despair.
- 06:30: Faith is saying things unseen, hope is hoping to see things unseen.
- 08:27: There are so many things, and we want to move towards hope.
- 10:28: As per Noah there is nothing more challenging for us in this lifetime to come to because Aristotle said that honesty is important to all wisdom.
- 11:45: We are all alone, but we are all alone together when we recognize our own aloneness, we recognize empathetically our aloneness, our brother and sister.
- 12:50: Remind other people that you hope the best for them and that the best for you will be arriving.
- 14:47: Noah suggests passing vulnerability to children this way your children will recognize that the strongest person in their life is not absent from vulnerability.
- 16:16: We are not seeking to solve all problems, but just help people explore ways to improve their lives, and help their families be happy, says Christopher.
3 Key Points
- Noah gives several real-life examples that give insights into hope and despair.
- One of the areas where we fall victim to despair is when our ego is in despair, says Noah.
- Noah talks about mental illness and the importance of seeking medical help in case feeling depressed.
Tweetable Quotes
- "I know there are people for many years I was asked to be a national philosopher, dealing with people in the field of addiction, and one of the things I would remind people that to some people dope is the is the only hope."- Noah benShea
- "I was thinking about hope versus faith the other day and somebody I think framed it for me and they framed it in a religious sense." - Christopher Robbins
- "For me, there has been no more profoundly despairing time in my life, and perhaps for those lists they were observing than when you wake up in." - Noah benShea
- "I don't think there's anything more challenging for us in this lifetime to come to because Aristotle said that honesty is important to all wisdom." - Christopher Robbins
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
- Familius: Instagram
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday Apr 05, 2023
Wednesday Apr 05, 2023
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly is a practicing clinical psychologist, wellness advocate, and author based in Sonoma County. Today she is talking to Heather Aranda, of the Family Arcade.
Episode Highlights
- 01:11: Heather is blessed with a total of eight children.
- 03:33: Heather is The Family Arcade on Instagram and she has a whopping 131,000 followers.
- 04:59: Heather shares how she started the YouTube channel and then later shifted to Instagram.
- 07:06: Heather shares how she gets a sense of completion that one never gets in the most beautiful way when raising children.
- 08:16: Heather loves Instagram and YouTube. The world she has created it is very exciting. She loves what she can do without the written work.
- 09:51: Heather explains how post-COVID she prompted her children to take up virtual classes.
- 11:38: Heather talks about the bedtime routine that she follows with her kids.
- 13:26: Heather shares how she starts a story and then another kid adds to it, and the one on the bottom bunk might list for something that comes next.
- 14:43: Heather shares how long it takes her to put eight children to bed.
- 15:40: Sometimes kids need to let go and the best way to do that is with the story, regardless of what their day was like.
- 16:22: When it comes to new stories, Heather's children play a big part.
- 20:48: Heather shares how she wants the videos to be about her family, regardless of who has the camera, who is recording.
- 21:38: What makes really excellent families is when everybody is working to support each other and the couple, the team are really cohesive and supportive of each other.
3 Key Points
- Carla and Heather discuss the importance of reading books to kids.
- Heather talks about the bedtime stories that she dramatically reads to her children.
- Heather shares how her work helps families be happy.
Tweetable Quotes
- "It's better to fight sadness with good news." - Heather Aranda
- "I decided to go with Instagram because well, it's instant and we have a lot of kids we are busy. If you want fast, quick gratification, you know to fill in the gaps and it still made the kids happy and it made me happy, and I enjoy editing so much." - Heather Aranda
- "All my children have their own song, something I fabricated." - Heather Aranda
- "As part of the winding down process, it really feels like you just incorporate it into a natural ritual that here this is the time the lights are low and let's kind of just get into the space of letting go of the day and moving into the night so we can wait for tomorrow." - Heather Aranda
Resources Mentioned
Wednesday Mar 29, 2023
Wednesday Mar 29, 2023
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Shaun Tomson.
Episode Highlights
- 01:49: Shaun talks about his book and the 18 chapter that it contains. They are based on the duality of what he experiences in life and how to move from the negative to the positive.
- 03:18: There is a synthesis between religion and kind of a secular perspective in terms of it's a foundation on which we build our lives and foundation on which we build our world.
- 04:51: As per Shaun it is faith that keeps us in the direction of where we want to go.
- 06:09: Life that bends inside us, gives us hope, meaning, reason and optimism.
- 08:55: Shaun shares the heartbreaking story of losing his son and how he coped with the grief.
- 10:40: Look for help from friends, rekindle those relationships, look from help for professional people and religious people and look for science and helping nature just work in nature.
- 11:32: Christopher had many conversations with psychologist authors and it's a common denominator that they say that those people with whom they are counseling and working with those who can accept the reality of where they are right now are able to move forward and those who cannot accept it, they continue to stay in place.
- 13:05: You put more pressure on yourself and eventually you get caught in this despair and anxiety and you just stop spinning downwards and it's not dissimilar when you can't accept reality and you get caught in this cycle of conjecture, you get open cycle.
- 16:16: Help others find the beauty in the world, find the signs that God exists and loves, and then things will continue.
3 Key Points
- Shaun explains how we come from different religions, but underneath we are the same in terms of how we relate to that one God or to that energy that we believe controls the world and is responsible for the world staying on its exes.
- There is a very powerful and inspirational story in the book about how Shaun lost and then regained his faith.
- Shaun explains how forgiveness is essential to cope with one's grief.
Tweetable Quotes
- "It's a book of perspective, not prescription." - Shaun
- "I can think about faith from a religious point of view, also can think of it from a secular point of view." – Christopher
- "I think back to my athletic days as a competitor, and it's not really aligned with grief. It is aligned with what can happen when you are an athlete." – Christopher
- "Whatever your sport may be, do that and then help others, whatever that might be mentoring, teaching and doing with our projects, getting involved with the NGO that might do something, and do you create inspirational project that is in memory of the of the person you lost." - Shaun
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
- Podcast Editing
Wednesday Mar 22, 2023
Wednesday Mar 22, 2023
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California talks to Noah benShea, one of North America's most respected and beloved poet philosophers. He has the Pulitzer Prize-nominated and internationally best-selling author of 29 books translated into 18 languages, embraced around the world. Today they will discuss the duality of anxiety and calm from his most recent book, The Surfer and the Sage, how to survive and ride life waves that he co-wrote with World Champion Surfer Sean.
Episode Highlights
- 01.54. Noah explains what is anxiety and calm?
- 02.30: If you think that you are going to find any plus in life without a minus or any minus in life for which you cannot find a plus.
- 02.58: Anxiety is the most common passport people use when they express how they are feeling now.
- 04.07: Think of anxiety as a balancing poll that will keep you upright on your life board as you witness waves that can threaten to topple you.
- 04.39: Calm is a word that has been idealized in every religion and teaching across time. Finding that quiet, safe place inside of you is about as good as it gets in life.
- 05.10: Choose calm when it calms your spirit, but do not choose calm when it robs you of the wild ride you want to remember for the rest of your life.
- 06.42: You have to decide what you are going to accept from your mind so that you have be able to step outside and realize you don't want to put your mind's thoughts in the driver's seat.
- 09.19: It is an ancient tradition, that in breath there is calm.
- 09.27: If you know someone who's going through an anxiety attack. One of the most common manifestations of it is you will witness them being unable to breathe.
- 11.13: Conspiring usually means people planning a robbery, but it really means people breathing together.
- 13.01: Noah talks about the 478 technique of breathing and how it works.
3 Key Points
- What people seldom realize is that anxiety is not necessarily negative.
- Don't give anxiety too much of your attention because anxiety isn't a boost, but a caution and anxiety won't improve your future.
- Noah talks about the ancient connection of breathing techniques and how it is mentioned in the bible as well.
Tweetable Quotes
- "It was clear to us that we had to write on any topic on the duality of it, because life seems to be coming and going at the same time." - Noah
- "The word anxious can by itself make you feel anxious." - Christopher
- "I remind people that the issue of being shamed by anxiety because you are so taught and tense about what is happening is a reminder that it is not an act of character to beat yourself up because you did something wrong." – Noah
- "I have a reminder when I say my prayers in the morning, I say to God I take your breath and I return your breath." - Noah
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
- Podcast Editing
- Get the book: HERE
Wednesday Mar 15, 2023
Wednesday Mar 15, 2023
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Jason Goldstein. He is the author and creator of Chop Happy, a fantastic blog. He specializes in delicious and simple comfort dishes that showcase rich flavors, inventive ideas, and unique cooking tips and advice. Jason is the author of the Happy Sandwich, scrumptious sandwiches to make you smile. Today they are going to explore how to save money, do fewer dishes, and save time in the kitchen.
Episode Highlights
- 03.44: As per Jason, when it comes to efficient kitchen management time is usually the most important. No matter what you do, no matter where you are, everyone wants some more free time or time for themself.
- 04.30: Jason shares how one can cook pasta in a slow cooker.
- 06.24: Jason shares how sheet pan saves dishes and how one can make a whole meal on a sheet pan.
- 07.27: Jason reveals how he keeps the meats and veggies separate in a sheet pan.
- 09.05: Doubling recipes save time shares, Jason.
- 10.02: Budget is important for everybody and as per Jason people overspend anyway, regardless of inflation and stuff.
- 10.30: Frozen vegetables are frozen at the peak of their freshness. So you are actually getting the same nutritional value and stuff for less price and it's already prepared for you
- 11.02: There are a lot of ways to save time. As per Jason see your pantry and use your frozen and canned items.
- 13.17 If you have bacon leftover and you use it for a recipe for breakfast, you can actually freeze it again and just take it out and use it, says Jason.
- 14.21: Jason shares how one can cook the perfect pizza.
- 16.00: Jason talks about cooking hacks that will help people in their kitchen, save time, have fewer dishes, and save money.
3 Key Points
- Jason shares how the slow cooker is a great piece of equipment that can help you to save time.
- Food is good money, food is expensive, and inflation has really hit people's pocketbooks. Jason shares his idea for saving money and how people can avoid overspending on food.
- Jason talks about the difference between frozen and non-frozen food and how much nutritional value each holds.
Tweetable Quotes
- "What you can do is after you get the kids to bed, you're getting ready to watch whatever shows on Netflix you want, you drop things into the slow cooker, put it in the fridge. And right before you go to work, you start your day. Just turn it on take it out of the fridge and turn on that slow cooker and it will cook dinner for you, so you don't have to spend a lot of time doing stuff throughout the day to make dinner happen." - Jason
- "If you are trying to roast meatballs and veggies with all those hacks on TikTok where you get the crispiest potatoes and you smash those potatoes, just take like the tin foil and make like a little section in the middle so it doesn't get there." - Jason
- "I actually love to double my recipes whenever I make, so if I am making a meatloaf with potatoes, I will actually use sushi pans and I will turn the oven to convection. So that the air circulates on everything and everything cooks evenly. And I will make two of them so that this way you one I will eat for the week or make sandwiches out of them or whatever it is we need to do. And the other one, I will wrap and freeze it and then I will just defrost it, so I have dinner another time for me." - Jason
Resources Mentioned
Wednesday Mar 08, 2023
Wednesday Mar 08, 2023
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, talks with Rebecca Greene. She will be talking about her new book, one and done. Rebecca shares how does her work and her book in particular help families be happy.
Episode Highlights
- 1.50: Rebecca loves her job as a therapist, and she has been working with clients. One of the things she has realized was that only-child families don't have a lot of resources just dedicated to them.
- 03.10: When Rebecca noticed the lack of guides for only child families, it made me realize that there was a wonderful opportunity to write a how-to parenting guide self-help book specifically tailored for only child families.
- 04.47: Rebecca discusses the blessings and challenges in raising an only child.
- 05.24: In today's society, most of the time both parents working outside of the home, or if it's a single parent family with that parent working outside of the home, time and energy are in short supply these days. So many parents make the decision to have one child because they feel that they can best raise a child when they get all of their time and energy rather than diluting it amongst multiple children.
- 05.55: Some families make their decision to have one child based on finances makes sense. They decide that they can live their best life if they have one child that they put all of their financial resources toward.
- 07.01: Rebecca talks about socializing issues faced by a single child.
- 08.20: One of the stereotypes of only children is that they are always lonely, says Rebecca.
- 09.37: In case of a single child parents can feel obligated to play with their child 24/7, like all the time which can cause burnout in the parents and many times parents, especially if they work from home or working full time, they just don't have a lot of time and energy left over to necessarily spend hours after work playing with their child.
- 11.20: It has been shown research wise that only children are very successful academically and, in their career, and that has been attributed to the fact that parents spend so much time one-on-one with their child.
- 12.18: Many only children excel academically in school. They go on to excel and become leaders in their career field. Especially because they have had so much practice being leaders at home and many times with their friends only children have been shown to have very high levels of self-confidence and self-esteem.
- 13.10: It is a very widely held stereotype about only children, that only children are always spoiled, that they can't share with other kids, that their social skills are not as good as children, growing up in families with siblings, but that actually are stereotypes, says Rebecca.
- 14.18: Parents can be very mindful when raising only child to make sure they have a realistic view of wants versus needs and to make sure that they have a balance in their life, so they get some of what they want.
- 17.43: Rebecca's book is written for both families who are one and done by choice, and also for families who are one and done not by choice.
- 19.26: Rebecca interviewed families from the UK, Australia, France, Japan, a variety of different countries, because she wanted to include what it's like to raise an only child in other countries
3 Key Points
- Rebecca's book is not meant to help parents make the decision to have one child it is when readers start the book, they have already made that decision. It is a step-by-step parenting guide to help parents.
- Rebecca shares how many only children really nurture their creative sides because they are very resourceful.
- Rebecca explains how it can be challenging to have a smaller family than one would have otherwise preferred.
Tweetable Quotes
- "I myself is an only child and I am raising an only child and my perspective as a parent and as an only child myself and as a therapist who works with families who have only children and are experiencing different issues related to that, it all made me realize that there should be more books dedicated to the topic of raising only children." - Rebecca
- "I have experienced what it feels like to be left out socially because we have one child and there wouldn't be a friend for the child that my son would like to hang out. So, it that can be really, really distressing." - Rebecca
- "When kids get some of the things that they want and many of the things that they need, that's a healthy balance. What becomes an unhealthy balance is when kids get everything, they need plus everything they want all the time." - Rebecca
Resources Mentioned
- Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple
- Familius Instagram Facebook Twitter
- Rebecca Greene Instagram
- https://www.rebeccagreeneauthor.com/
- Podcast Editing